Senator Dean Heller Has New Life

Posted by Michael Zahara on Dec 23, 2017

‘When your party has the presidency and controls both Houses of Congress for the first time in years, you don’t fire your United States Senator who sits on the powerful Finance Committee beneficial to everyone in your state, all of its citizens, and its businesses which employ you and your family!’   We should fire political misfit misanthrope and perennial loser Danny Tarkanian whose arrogance gave us Harry Reid’s final term in 2010!’

                           —Mike Zahara December 14, 2017

There are Activist Republicans here in Nevadastan and around the nation who are hellbent not on winning elections, but on punishing those who’ve sinned within their party in their teeny-tiny worldviews. 

Seriously, Social Media today is filled with these GOP gadflies insisting Judge Roy Moore in Alabama was robbed of victory and that they want him sworn in as the winner of AG Jeff Sessions’ former seat there, instead of them all looking to the heavens and thanking Jesus and His Pops for Black-American Dem Women in Alabama for turning out so strongly for the GOP and removing from the DNC’s arsenals, two solid years going forward of fundraising using Moore in the US Senate and rubbing the national GOP’s noses in his views of the world which wouldn’t have been helpful to Republicans for 2018 or 2020 either!

I’ve spoken to about 50 Dems around the country who actually believe that Alabama was a major accomplishment for the Democrats, they all perhaps forgetting since its been soooo long since Democrats have won anything, that a win has many definitions but more than implies you’re raising more money, gaining more voters and their confidence, and not working so tirelessly defeating the Democratic Party’s only source of non-Trump fundraising in 2017, Judge Roy Moore in Alabama this year!

Still, despite Trump and fellas like Judge Moore to count on driving Dems to donate, the Grand Old Party continues to shovel in the big cash in every region of the country and among all of its Groups Bases too, sometimes exceeding the Dems by greater than 3:1 consistently, regardless of routinely offending Democratic Identity Only Zealots & Bigots who haven’t stopped screaming in over two years now!

If I were wearing my Dem Activist Hatin’ On Hard/Vagina Hat this cycle, I’d have strenuously objected to anyone saying or doing anything at all but making Judge Moore feel as comfortable, relaxed, talkative, and getting him as liquored up as humanly possiblemaybe I’d even have some of those sexy-ass third-grade girls wander by to loosen his inhibitions for TV on the off-chance he even has inhibitions!  We’d even be publicly congratulating our GOP competitors anywhere and everywhere and on any platform and doing that very nicely and politely too for their party’s wonderful choice to compete for the US Senate seat against us!

The DNC doesn’t listen to guys like me anymore and I can’t associate my political self with such rigid Democratic Party Nazi fascist bigotry, hyper-racist invective, and ethnically biased and prejudiced hatreds coming from all Dem directions at the DNC today!

They’re even proud they’ve turned Virginia Blue!  Oh my, VA has voted Blue in the last three presidential elections and is Blue by no other measure than those 12+ years both parties use!  Same with New Jerseystan when if that state hadn’t returned to Blue after all of the crumbs GOP Gov Chris Christie left all over the state, then it should have sunk back into the ocean right then and there!

Representative Dixiecrat Dinosaur, Daughter of the Confederacy, Dina Titus (D-Minority-Hating Heights, NV) out with a Press Release the other day about how much momentum Democrats have gotten from all of the above….and to send her $3!   You’ll remember Dina Titus as the annoying neon-White woman whose been lecturing us for decades about how unfair and sexist Harry Reid has always been to her but who in the aftermath of Jim Murren’s Mandalay Bay Massacre, let a blurb out that she’s a phony and has always been a phony because she’s not going to assert as NVDEMS’ most senior Democratic officer-holder and challenge Harry Reid’s appalling Political Terrorism on Nevada by taking on his 2018 choice for US Senate against Dean Heller, Wacky ‘Jacky the Lackey’ Rosen, who’s been in the US House all of ten minutes and is already bored and ready to be a senator now despite dozens of Dems statewide far more qualified and ready!

Meanwhile, Nevada’s very own Judge R0y Moore, Congressman Ruben Kihuen (D-Pervy Palisades, NV), is a Great Gift from God to Republicans everywhere for his daring to lecture to all 325 million of us that ‘No, does not mean No’ to Ruben Kihuen and that it never has, and that he’ll be leaving on his own Pervy Terms Clock fulfilling his full-term, earning the corresponding  full pension credits while doing so, and of course, gorging himself full until the new Congress is sworn in on his deluxe healthcare insurance coverage the rest of us are barred by law from purchasing.

Re-victimizing his very credible two known female victims for now a 2nd public time and in front of very female friendly GOP House Ethics Committee interrogators and for the US House record….then as well as his 19 years of predatory sexual ‘bullying’ anyone he’s had a sexual encounter with since turning 18!   It hasn’t sunk in yet but every Republican in the universe is going to be using pervert rapist Ruben Kihuen very effectively now to show Dem duplicity and double-standards and that the rules don’t ever apply to them!  If they had a chance to pick up the House in 2018 which was maybe 2% last month, is now -200% and its not going to happen thanks to Nevada’s Judge Moore, Congressman Ruben Kihuen, who is working tirelessly to re-elect Senator Heller and each moment Ruben lingers on, is that many more votes for Nevada’s now most important elected official serving us in the senate.

Ruben Kihuen being so entitled-feeling for another year in office he commands and demands from us, is making President Trump the second consecutive Republican president to score the very rare seat pick-ups in his first Mid-Terms next November and I’ve not yet back-tracked the possibility of 60 GOP seats in the US Senate either and don’t see myself doing that and predict today no less than 55 US Senate seats to the GOP…and Senator Dean Heller returning as re-elected too!

Re-elected with a corresponding major increase in his political power, position, stature, policy, and party prestige, and a president more likely to act and play nicely after Heller winning re-election in 2018 and Trump needing him for his own re-election in 2020.

Many of these current juvenile GOP bomb-throwers here in Las Vegastan are the remnants of the defunct and failed Tea-Partiers lead by Danny Tarkanian (R-Stupid Fuqr Falls, NV) who’s only succeeded in giving to Harry Reid his final term in 2010.  Politically, I’ve never forgiven Danny Tarkanian for his years long Office-Shopping Losing, he believing that starting out for smaller and achievable public offices and building his Political Brand up is beneath him though it worked out very nicely for his bad-ass, tough broad mother, Councilwoman Lois Tarkanian, who off-ed former Councilwoman Janet Moncrief, as well as now retired LVMPD Patrolwoman Laurie Bisch in separate races.

Though Danny accidentally scored his very first primary win in 2016 in NVCD03, the Dependable Dumb-ass actually lost the general election to Synagogue Vacuuming Olympics Champion Wacky ‘Jacky the Lackey’ Rosen who now imagines herself a US Senator on Harry Reid’s orders to her!  She gives bubble-headed dipshits a bad name!

Stupid-ass Danny, already declared for a 2018 rematch in NVCD03, couldn’t quit CD03 fast enough to run against ‘Wacky Jacky’ for US Senate absolutely confident he will vaporize Senator Dean Heller in the Primary this coming June, and then ‘Wacky Jacky’ in the General in November. for those having that not-so-fresh feeling of Deja Vu all over again, the Ass-Clown basically said and did the exact same bullshit in 2010 when he was going to destroy Sue and Sharron and then make Harry Reid his Bitch!

…’member that one kids?  Remember how well that Danny Tarkanian stupid-ass shit turned out for all of us?

Wait a minute, Harry Reid had promised Dean Heller the Nevada Governor’s Mansion if he off-ed Rochelle-y for him five years back, right?

Senator Heller, political dynamics changed and Uncle Harry’s putrid word given to prospective candidates isn’t worth one of his dirty diapers or booger-filled nasty-ass Kleenex either.  You got played very badly Senator Heller and were lied to by fake-ass Mormon Harry Reid—gee, imagine that, huh?—so just get over it and buck up little buck-a-roo, because we’ve got to get some things done from your now Alabama and TCJA super boosted re-election efforts!


It remains today the very dumbest of many dumb-ass things this state has done that we had allowed two US House members, both with highly coveted seats on Ways and Means no one could ever take away from either, to run against one another for the US Senate 5 years ago.  Just incredibly myopic, stupid, and short-sighted especially of Gaming and Mining here to let Harry Reid’s intense jealousy and envy of Shelley Berkley’s enormous star power trump what was best politically for this state’s business interests above all else! 

Dean Heller beat her then and with my vote, me confident she was deliberately committing political suicide because everyone in her family who had reached their early 100s like she had, had already died of cancer, and she wanted to ride Dr Larry like a horny former Congresswoman as much as she could back then.  Two months later after she had filled multiple Bucket Lists, knew she fuqd up badly, and set her sites on becoming Las Vegastan’s next mayor!

Had Harry Reid been at all confident or possessing any acumen at all, he’d have deferred publicly to Rochelle-y 2018 asking if she wanted a rematch next year with Dean Heller!  That’s what a genuinely skilled and savvy political leader would have done for her and the party.  I think she still would have graciously declined this cycle but that being asked publicly by him, was a necessary nod to her very high voter affection she has in great abundance and Harry simply does not have, never had, and never will have!

Though Dina Titus Divide Us would have beaten ‘Wacky Jacky’ badly in the Primary, she’d have lost just as badly to Senator Heller in the General we’re so tired of her bullshit.  However, Shelley Berkley would have whupped Dean Heller’s ass next year and lifted the entire statewide Dem ticket in Mid-terms Dems are generally very terrible in–and now Dean Heller knows that too!

Senator Heller, I’m assuming you need a reminder from me of a number of things to get your Campaign Mojo back on track right after New Year’s and have it burning through Solid Rocket Boosters your new BFF SML Mitch McConnell will be sending to your efforts the entire rest of the way until the last poll closes in November because you should not be seeing any clear path for Party Pooper Pariah Gadfly Office-Shopper Loser Danny Tarkanian to cost you a Primary win in June despite your lackluster efforts so far!

Before I assist you here any further Senator Heller, myself and all of our completely disinterested voters here wish to know if you’re in love with Brian Sandoval and if that’s why his soon-to-be ex-wife Kathleen threw his sorry lyin’ ass out a minute ago and filed for divorce citing irreconcilable Mighty Heidi?

Brian Sandoval Reid has done great damage to your aspirations Dean Heller and its time for a quickie divorce from him!  He plans on being Barack Sandoval advocating for Margins 2.0 to not be repealed, and Obama’s Medicaid Bribe to be obscenely expanded even more–and doing this while you’re trying to be re-elected that little bastard!

Flush him Dean, Kathleen did without blinking an eye too!

Senator, you are the senior sitting senator from Nevada, you are our state’s senior, highest ranking elective office-holder, you are the highest ranking member of the LDS faith in Nevada holding public office with you holding title to this very powerful street cred sir...not the Old Blind Bitch retired Senator Misanthrope who promised you everything and forget who you were with his very next diaper change! 

Harry’s pulled that same exact shit with everyone in Nevadastan including his own son, Brian Sandoval....err. I mean Rory Reid!  Someone’s gotta drive the wooden stake through the area in his chest where his heart is supposed to be, and that someone is YOU Senator Heller cuz none of the bitches down at NVDEMS is at all interested, they’re too busy fighting and crying and bitching and moaning and trying not to sleep with Ruben or William…or even Tick!

I say you and me get us one of those Dem Medicare Wheelchairs and coax Harry Reid into it and then push him of the cliff and into traffic with a speeding train approaching!    You in?  I’ll even push!

You’re the Capo sir, you’re the Godfather Deanyou’re the undisputed titular head of Political Nevada for both parties because the Fake-Ass, non-Retired Blind Old Bitch has burned NVDEMS and its Ops and fake-ass stage sets and scenery to the ground…and then straight down into Earth’s iron core to boot!    Everyone is warring and whoring and scoring with Ruben Kihuen’s brand new inflatable dateable blow up version of himself-boy, he sure did blow himself up by not taking my counsel in the previous piece here Senator Heller, didn’t he?

Don’t be a Dumb-ass Dean, you have nothing to apologize for to your party’s Insane Tea-Party Cast-Offs who don’t understand one must assess political realties with a wide-angle lens and very deep perspective.  You have headwinds coming only from your own party because Adam Laxalt has Ants in his Pants and his dick in his hand and his Auntie Neenah-bear doesn’t care for her beloved nephew cuz she’s still puking her guts out that her horny sister slept with Pete Domenici–and frankly, we all still are!

Once his greedy consultants got word that Adam’s Laxalt’s grandparents were the Reagan’s Japanese gardeners, well then, he threw caution to the wind and told him to go for Governor instead of staying put to block Aaron Fraud Ford for NVAG.  Mafioso Godfather, former Assemblyman Pat Hickey, did the impossible here once defeating the very best, most talented Democrat in this entire state in Marcus Conklin and blessing us with Wes Duncan instead and who’s a fine fella I am sure, but a fella who looks like an Aryan Youth Camp Director for a cycle that that’s going to play very poorly in senator!

Adam Laxalt’s impatience and impertinence is annoying as all Hell Senator Heller and has serious repercussions up and down the entire GOP ballot all over the state and is a serious threat to your re-election efforts!  Senator, you are Don Dean Corleone Heller now and if you don’t assert its gonna hurt...badly!

Today, Adam Laxalt loses BIGLY because he always looks like he’s counting his Hot Wheels and Matchbox cars to most voters.  Wes Duncan is his ‘Special Friend’ we can call ’em Tranny now thanks to Pat Spearman!  The top of the GOP ticket looks like Shopping Center Carnie Folks,  Adam, Wes, Barbara, and Michael have gained a lot of unattractive political weight and baggage-blubber.  Let’s get Stavros Anthony at the top instead of CD04, Adam and Wes staying put at NVAG until both sprout a chest hair or two and some pubes, maybe Wes to some SD the GOP desperately needs—-I’ll call Pat Hickey who worships me, to get it done!

Adam Laxalt is damaging his very valuable Political Brand only because Grandpa Paul Laxalt could do really nice topiary for the Reagans at their Santa Barbara ranch and the White House the folks at Disney World copied and took as their own and screwing him out of royalties!

I hope that you know this but on the off-chance that you do not Mr Senator, Senator Paul Laxalt was to become Ronald Reagan’s Vice-President having 100% approval and fierce advocacy from Mrs Reagan who got rolled and bitch-fight rumbled by Barbara Bush demanding her George earned it as Ambassador to China, CIA Director, her Saturday night toenail polisher, etc…

Keep in the back of your mind Mr Senator that we’d have never seen Bush 41 puking into the Japanese Prime Minister’s lap, or him OK-ing WTO for China with no strings attached, his losing to Clinton which set us on 25+ years of pure Hell, or his son giving to us No Child Left Behind, Common Core, and Medicare prescription Drug benefits without even means testing recipients, and 16 years of War subcontracted to Halliburton and paid for on Saudi and Chinese credit cards, if the Laxalt Family had any history of good decisions and going to the mat for that which truly mattered!

What’s Republican about any of that Mr Senator?  I’m more Republican than any of them and I am here to assist your correcting your 2018 course in hope that you are true to your GOP bona fides and don’t wish to become a Junior Democrat Debutant Deplorable!

There are others running in 2018 who could win but are seeking the wrong office and screwing up a potentially historic outcome because the GOP lacks a strong, strategic-thinking State Party Chair as does NVDEMS whose Chair is a politically retarded neophyte Harry Reid also ordered into Black Face and he happily complied!  Your 17 county party chairs leave everything to be desired and Mr McDonald down here in Clark wears the Metro given nick-name of ‘Easy Money’ which perhaps isn’t a compliment for a former cop!

I say we fix William McCurdy up with Kathleen Sandoval and tell him that she’s yet to experience ‘a real man’ to keep Bri-Bri busy with raging jealousy and regret that he’s never touched her even after the Gibbons’ soiled the Mansion so well for them and so he’s not fuqing up your re-election crusading for stupid-ass shit!

Your ticket is a hot mess and is the greatest danger to your re-election which I wish to see completed successfully because if you don’t do some offices rearranging Senator Heller, The Three Stupidos:  Aaron, Kelvin, & Fat Pat are going to ruin the entire state in minutes!

Think about a Governor Sisolak whoring for anyone and never having a Veto Pen and an all Dem Legislature absent any ideas or talent as the 79th Session showed to us all, and if that’s not enough to motivate you to assert as your party’s Big Cheese & Harry Reid Legacy Assassin, let’s start the paperwork for our state’s official name-change to East Californiastan right now!

Mike Zahara Siganture

Michael Zahara

A National Treasure!