Posted by Mike Zahara on May 5, 2013
He was mostly there to get Damned to Hell for our team had we lost because Jesus don’t like to lose the big ones and neither does Brad!!!
So I take a call from Argentina but this was from the country, not the lady I know down south in Florida, but not that far damn south like to Buenos freakin’ Aires-which translates to ‘Beautiful Air’ in Polish, but is a city that smells like feet and farts most days and you’re left wondering what these people are eating down there.
Score one for their local Chamber of Commerce people who took a negative and made a positive by naming the city something that has no basis in truth or fact—and my taking that call this past winter began my journey of running my first Papal Election along with Dem consultant Brad Mayer who I thought to invite along just in case my candidate lost and there was going to be hell to pay with Jesus and His gang—Mayer famously took an obscure unknown mayoral spouse and made her into a kind of Pope of Main St in Las Vegas—so I thought we’d need him in Buenos Aires and in Rome.
Jesus Christ, shepherding a future candidacy/papacy with egos that big was something to behold; I’ve dealt with prima donnas before but this was ridiculous and all that red on these Princes of the Church was getting on my nerves regardless that I was Confirmed into the faith at the hand of one of their old, long dead colleagues!
And while we were gone, Metro further deteriorated and the Bat Signal shone across the Roman sky calling us home to Commissioner Gordon’s office in Sin City.
First, the Lt Hans Walters murder/suicide event took me off my game as I had just met him late last fall on the Strip—his subordinates didn’t see it coming and neither did his superiors who ‘boiled him in his own juices’ according to one Patrol officer in that AC, and I tend to believe that because the El-Tee was one of a dying breed at the LVMPD who stood up against the slime and sleaze of the Doug Gillespie Corruption Regime and had a solid record going to back many years for many officers over his career.
Then the highest ranking female in Metro’s history, Deputy Chief Kathy O’Connor retired out without fanfare like Daddy Jett did while Dougie fell all over himself with media PR for Ray Flynn which made him seem Cardinal-like despite the grave damage Flynn did to the department late in his career. More on DC O’Connor in ‘The Women of Metro’ piece coming up too.
<–Old fave fat-f*ck Todd Fasulo (right, wife snickering at left) gets made a Deputy Chief and while that sucks donkey balls bigtime, now Deputy Chief Al Salinas moves up to the same rank and new position, a years long delay in his rising in rank despite his being one of their best guys.
This might also be a good time to apologize to humanity in general for VIP’s Steve Sanson—he of Big Betty H lovin’—for spouting off on Stanley Gibson when the Gibson family has an army of lawyers speaking for them just fine and everyone especially Steve Sanson missing so far that perhaps the reason that things went south during that incident was because another Lieutenant showed up and interjected himself into an already progressing situation/operation and that’s how the miscues happened—Desert Sky’s failures shone brightly here too—if anyone should be fired by the Use of Force Board it should also be that Lt from what we know today, dontcha think?
Dougie’s butt-buddy Phil Roland of Harris Corp—owner of the system Metro dubbed Desert Sky is said to have gotten a 5 million dollar bonus form just for snagging the Metro account for Harris only moments after he retired out as a civilian from the LVMPD.
Not a word about suing Harris for their product’s failure that contributed to Gibson’s death either.
And during a break in all this drama, our ‘lil Douglas—the worst police chief in America—announced he’s going to run again because the Supremes said his and other offices weren’t covered under Term Limits and because US Dixon rose way too fast and isn’t Sheriff material yet and he lacks a public sparkle and didn’t want to retire with Doug to run around together naked in the woods.
Most people who ask me are surprised that I say what’s missing most under Gillespie is Bill Young; hate him though I did, he was a magnificent public face of the department when he had a couple (dozen) in him when he went on one of his media tear tours to rail about this or that
This is where Laurie Bisch and Bill Conger come into the picture and my having just run a successful Papal race, I’ve got it on Divine Authority that God is gonna smite both Bisch and Conger’s asses bigtime if their egos insist on having them run for Sheriff again in 2014.
He’s a little bit stiff so this is harder than it may seem!!!
That said, I like them both though poor Bill Conger will seemingly do or try for any available job these days having recently been seen at the Home Depot in Henderson hanging with the day worker guys to get out of the house a bit. This is common in couples who are suddenly together after years of different things going on in their marriage; Bill suddenly discovered Alexis likes doilies and frilly girly things when he has a more lesbian sensibility, and she discovered it really was Bill who was fartin’ their house up so badly and not their dog who got the blame. and all he has to show for it is a bigger ass-dent in his favorite chair and 73 bird house he built to pass the time when I could have been making him millions as Vegas’s ‘go-to’ guy for fun guerrilla safety tips for tourists etc…in an ‘Ask the Chief’ series of entertaining safety related 2 minute drop-ins for the news, in room, and YouTube type programming.
<–Another option is a different tact for ‘Ask the Chief’ and this one would involve discussing ladies lingerie in the middle of the Strip for two minute segments. Conger is slightly pervy enough looking that men would automatically go to him for advice on what to buy their lady and what she’d look and feel good in and women would salute his taste and rascally qualities that only an old pervy guy can get away with and still be thought charming, and cute by the fairer sex!!!
Chief Conger let’s talk about a future in a venture you can really win big on-media— ‘cause the sheriff thing’s not there for you.
…or for Patrolperson Laurie Bisch; what she’s up to these days as the only female working at the LVMPD—at least the only woman we know about publicly (again see future ‘The Women of Metro’ piece!), she’s going to be harder to place in an alternate career and not as easy as Bill Conger would be to place as Chief Slick—Celebrity Cop!
The idea is to get the 2014 field to clear some decks and coalesce around a strong, credible candidate voters want to take a look at and Douglas has given he or she a ton of ammunition to fire directly at him throughout the entire campaign.
This will mean a lot of police managers are going to have to come out of the shadows and background and publicly support a candidate you all know can kick Dougie’s ass and be public about your support too. The irony here is that had Conger and Bisch talked a deal in 2006, one or the other would have beat him the first time out and be our sheriff today—divide and conquer quickcourse back then—neither has a prayer to ever beat Doug Gillespie, so neither should get into the 2014 race because both will be spoilers and re-elect the worst police chief in America today.
Glimmers of interesting things are happening behind the scenes today at the LVMPD lead by those determined to retire Gillespie for good and at this point all we can do is hope…
…and pray Bill and Laurie get the message to take a pass on 2014.